Why This Industry Is Messy
- Intentionally complex pricing (interchange, markup, fees)
- Sales commissions create biased recommendations
- Long contracts with early termination penalties
- Hidden fees revealed only after you sign
Payment Processing Help — Call or Text for Honest Guidance
Confused about credit card processing fees, POS systems, or merchant accounts? Get straight answers before signing anything. No sales pressure, no commission bias.
What You Actually Need
- Clear explanation of your current statement
- Honest assessment of whether you're overpaying
- Guidance on Stripe vs Square vs merchant account
- Help avoiding bad contracts and junk fees
How We Help
- Review your statement in plain English
- Explain what you should actually be paying
- Recommend options (no referral fees taken)
- One text or call — no follow-up spam
Payment Processor Comparison (No BS Edition)
Here's what each option is actually good for, with no sales pitch.
Square
✓ Best for: New businesses, low volume, no monthly fee tolerance.
✗ Watch out: Expensive at high volume (2.6-2.9% + 10-30¢). Limited customization.
Use if: Doing under $5K/month. Switch once you scale.
Stripe
✓ Best for: Online sales, subscriptions, developer-friendly APIs.
✗ Watch out: Not great for retail/in-person. Holds can be aggressive for new accounts.
Use if: You're online-first or need custom checkout flows.
Traditional Merchant Account
✓ Best for: High volume ($10K+/month), lower per-transaction fees.
✗ Watch out: Complex contracts, more paperwork, monthly fees.
Use if: Volume justifies it. Get 2-3 quotes.
PayPal / Venmo
✓ Best for: Peer-to-peer, quick invoicing, existing customer trust.
✗ Watch out: High fees (2.9% + 30¢ or more). Buyer disputes favor customer.
Use if: Casual sales or invoicing. Not ideal for serious retail.
Text PJ · Payment Processing Clarity
Send your current statement or describe your situation.
One text, honest breakdown, no sales pitch.
773-544-1231
One text, honest breakdown, no sales pitch.
773-544-1231
Common Payment Processing Questions
Q: What's a "good" credit card processing rate?
A: Retail (swiped/chip): 1.8-2.3% + 10-15¢. Online/keyed: 2.5-3.0% + 30¢. If you're paying more, you're likely overpaying. Equipment fees should be minimal or zero.
Q: Should I use Stripe or Square?
A: Stripe for online/software businesses. Square for retail/in-person. Both are fine for starting out, but switch to a merchant account once you hit $10K+/month.
Q: What are the hidden fees I should watch for?
A: PCI compliance ($99-200/year), statement fees ($10-20/month), batch fees ($0.10-0.25), early termination ($200-500). Read your contract carefully. Text us your contract — we'll flag traps.
Q: Can I switch processors without downtime?
A: Yes. Most switches take 3-7 days. Run both systems in parallel for 1-2 days to test. We walk you through the process.
💡 Real Talk: Why We Do This
Payment processing sales people make fat commissions. That creates biased advice. We don't sell processing, so we have no incentive to oversell you on features you don't need or lock you into bad contracts.
Our revenue model: if you need actual implementation help (integration, setup, training), we charge for that time. But the initial "should I do this?" guidance? Free. Text 773-544-1231.
SideGuy Solutions · Home · Updated March 2026